Jokes

Hindi Marriage and Pati Patni Jokes

Patni:-sharab peen eke baad kya tumhe mera naam bhi yaad nahin rehta?
Pati:-pee lene ke baad to main har gam bhool jata hoon,meri jaan.

Nai nai car chalana sikhi biwi:aaj hum car se jaenge aur car main chalaungi.
Pati:-kon nahin,jaenge car main aur aaenge akhbaar main.

Pati patni College Joke 
     Patni – Collage ke bare me tumhara koi bura anubhav hai?
    Pati – Han, Tumhari aur meri paheli mulakat college me he to hui thi.

Pati patni Sms Joke 
Patni:- main tumse jo kuch bhi kahti hu tum ek kaan se sunkar doosre se nikaal dete ho.
Pati:-aur main tumse kuch bhi kahta hu to tum dono kaan se sunkar muh se nikaal deti ho.

Funny Pati patni Joke 
Pati:-main jeevan main aaj jo kuch bhi bana hoon,apne aap bana hoon.
Patni:-lo, main aaj tak bekar hi bhagwaan ko kosti rahi.

Pati patni Sms 
Patni:-kyon jab main moti hojaaungi,tab bhi tum mujhe aise hi pyaar karoge?
Pati:-bilkul nahin, maine sirf such dukh main saath dene ka vaada kiya tha.

Pati Patni Joke 
patni : suno ji, bus me aapko logo neitna kyon mara?
pati : Are mera ek photo bus main ek aurt ke pair ke niche gir gaya tha aur mene kaha
madam zara saree uper kijiye photo lena hai…. 

Hindi Joke about Husband Wife 
Pati:-aaj main sabha pati banunga.
Patni:-khabardaar jo aap mere alawa kisi aur ke pati bane.

Pati patni Hindi Joke
pati: Ghar ka saara keemti samaan kahin chhupakar rakh do, padosi aa rahe hain.
patni: Kyonji ! kya Aapke dost chura lenge?
pati: are Nahin, who apna saaman pehchaan lenge.

Hindi Husband Wife Joke 
patni: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.
pati: Tum bhi to kitni moti ho gayi ho.
patni: Main to maa banne wali hoon!
pati: Main bhi to baap banne wala hoon

Cute wife joke 
     patni: “Aapne pichle saal salgireh pe mujhe lohay ka bed diya tha, Iss baar aapka kya iraada hai?”
pati: “Iss saal uss mein current chorne ka iraada hai.”

Funny husband Wife Sms 
Patni: -suno ji,aapko mujhme kya achcha lagta hai. meri samajhdari ya meri beauty.
pati: -mujhe to tumhari ye mazak karne ki aadat bahot pasand hai.

Funny Cute wife sms Joke 
Pati :- main tumhare saath kuch bhi share kar sakta hu.
Patni:-chalo phir bank account se start karte hain.

Funny Wife Sms 
Pati:-mere mrne ke baad tumhe mere jaisa doosra aadmi nahin milega.
Patni:- tumhe kisne keh diya, ki main doosra aadmi tumhare jaisa chahti hoon.

Husbands joke on marriage 
Patni:- main tumhare bina mar jaaungi.
Pati:-main bhi mar jaaunga. Itni khushi main bardasht nahin kar paaunga.

Funny relationship Hindi Joke 
Patni:- main tumhare bina mar jaaungi.
Pati:-main bhi mar jaaunga. Itni khushi main bardasht nahin kar paaunga.

Husband wife joke 
Pati:-mani abhi saree ka fanda banakar faansi laga loonga.
Patni:-kya gajab karte ho,nai saree hai.

Funny teasing joke 
Pati:-jab bhi main is talwaar ko dekhta hoon to mujhe ladai per jaane ka mann karta hai.
Patni:-to phir jaate kyon nahin?
Pati:-phir unki tooti hui taang yaad aa jaati hai.

Husband wife joke in Hindi 
Husband wife ki godi me leta hua tha,
Wife – kesa lag raha he ji?
Husband- jese visnu bhagwan shesnaag ki god me lete ho.

Pati Patni Hindi Joke 
Ek makeup sacheton lady ne mritu kaal par uski pati se daka.
Pati:bolo tumhara antim issa keya hai?
Patni:mere marne ke bad meri sundar tasbir akhbar pe chapne par mere age math  likhna.
Pati:kiun?
Patni:kiun ki log ye jan jayega ke meine budhi ho gaya tha. 

Marriage Joke Hindi 
Husband:  Agar tumhe kuch ho gaya to mein pagal ho jaaunga.

Wife: Doosri shaadi to nahin karogey na ?

Husband:  Pagal ka kya hai, o kuch bhi kar sakta hai 

Cat and Wife Joke 
Santa banta  Se Puchha Ki-Tum agli  Janam Me Kya Ban’na chaho gi?

banta-” A Billi”
Why?

Because  Meri Wife Sirf billi Se Hi Darti Hai 

Marriage Joke in Hindi 
kya larki thi...
Shohar: Kal mere khuab main ek larki aai thi,
Wah! kya larki thi.

Bibi: Akeli he aai hogi?

Shohar: Tumko kese pata:

Bibi: Uska husband mere khuab main
tha. 

Marriage Joke 
Pyar b ajab shay he

Maa se payar hota hai to Ebadat
Baap se payar hota hai  to Muqadas
Bhai se payar hota hai  to Aqidat
Didi  se payar hota hai ho to Farz
&
Wife  se payar  hota hai  to
sab kehte hen k SALA BIWI ka GHULAM H     hain 

Husband and Wife 
Wife:  Ma bachunga nahi  Marr jaongi...

Husband   : Mein bhi Marr jaon ga!

Wife :  Mein to Bimaar hoon isleya marr jaungi  tum kyon maro gaey ?

Husband :  Mein itni Khushi Bardasht nahi kar sakta ! 

Marriage 
Beta papa ko pucha: papa sadi kana ma kitna  kharch hota hai
Papa na bola : mujee pata nahi hay beta !
May abibhi  uska lia pay karta hoo .

Hindi Marriage Joke 
Shaadi karne ki baad aur shaadi karne ki aage

1. tumhare baat kokil ki tarah hai.
dhat,kan ki kach me ghanor ghanor nahi karna

2. biswas karo, meine tumko bina nahi reh parunga.
har baat me tum tumhari bap ki baari jane ke baat nahi karna, jao na tumko koun rokha hai?

3. tumko liee maine hajar saal bachna parunga.
uff, tumhare sansar mein mere jiban ekbare biss ho gaya.

Aapko dhund raha hai

4. future ki baat soch kar ek  moment par aap crore paysa kharcha kar sakti hai.
Aapko dhund raha hai Political dall ne(Aapko election par khare karne ke liee).

5. onle ek abul biri ke liee aap ek aadmi ki hatma kar sakti hai.
Aapko dhund raha hai RAB(dunia ki narak dekhne ke liee).

6. aapki do haat mein kharach karna paroge?
Aapko dhund raha hai ladkione.

7. keyaa aap ek palak par jo vi opokarm karna parte hai?
Aapko dhund raha hai Police force. 

Hindi Husband and Wife Marriage Joke 
Bibi:kyeaa hua tumko aj bohot khus najar a raha hai?
Pappu:nahi kuch nahi. Tum bahar ja rahe ho iss lyee
Bibi: uss lyee tumhare khus hone se kyeaa irada hai.
Pappu: meri ek dawat hai meine vi uha jaunga. Tum agar bahar jaoge tab maine bahar jane parunga na!!! 

Funny Wife Joke 
Bibi:jiban par maine koi punno kia tha us liee tumhare tarah pati mila.
Swami:aur mere liee wo paap ki sasti hai 

Hilarious Husband and Wife 
Pati:kaha ja rahe ho?

Patni: Jahannam par.

Pati: Thank you,jao. 

Funny Pati and Patni 
Pati:mehman ko khana dia magar chamach kiu nahi dia?

Patni:voi paa karke.

Pati:kasko voi pa kar.

Patni:usko chamach hai ye jodi samajh jayee iss lyee. 

Funny Hindi Pati Patni Joke 
Patni:tumhare paas koi arman pesh kar gaya to tum bola paysa nahi hai.

Pati:keyaa nahi di tumko? To jo tumko dena parega uski paas jao na. 

Pati Patni Joke 
Patni:meine Babaki ghar mein kitni sukhi tha,tumare ghar a kar meri jiban ses ho gaya.

Pati: keyaa hua?

Patni:keyaa nahi hua? Tumhre pas meine ek diamond ki neckless chaha magar tumhare iss month par pocket khali… 

Funny Husband and Wife Marriage Joke 
Ek din ek busstand me vul kar yatri log gaitlok samajh kar
Local gari me uth gaya, gari to rukh rukh kar jata hay
Yatri:keya hua bhai gari to rukh rukh kar jata hay kiu?
Helper: yeh to local hai..
Yatri: local aur gatelock yeh to tum log dega us lie yatri log samassa mein parega kiun? 

Funny Joke in Hindi 
Swami: basar rat mein uski wife ko 100 rs. De kar sorry bola, mujhe bhul ho gaye, sab samay deta hu to habit ho gaya.
Patni: tum to mujhko rupee de rahe ho, mein to mere cousin ko free dia. 

Hindi Husband and Wife Joke 
Husband ek rat kagaj mein likh kar rakha 7 am par mujhe jara dak dena
Wife woh dekh kar likha: already 7am. Baj gaya.